# Death to celebrity chefs!!!



## knyfeknerd

I've been thinking about this for quite a long time now, but after flipping through channels last night and actually watching about 5 minutes of "The Taste" last night...............
...........
......ANTHONY BOURDAIN!!!!!! you are such a giant hypocrite! 
I'm not gonna lie, Kitchen Confidential is one of the best books ever written. It came to me at the perfect time in my life and inspired me with it's cynicism and realism. I felt like "This guy gets me" That book made me want to work harder for less money and eat my chef's turds every chance I got-for less money!
It's the "Hard work is a reward unto itself" kinda mentality. If you haven't been in the trenches you wouldn't understand. If you haven't been hit in the head with a sautee pan from chef you are a puss and should go hang yourself in shame because you'll never be as badass as us kinda thing.
I've read all his books, even fiction. I've seen a lot of his shows. Not all, I mean I do WORK for a living. But this Shite???!!!???

This is just the tip of the iceberg though. At what point in time do you stop REALLY being a chef and caring about the food at YOUR restaurant(s) and become a jet-setting celebrity?
I see these ads in Bon Apetit with Michael Symon and Marcus Samuelsson eating caviar and drinking ****ing champagne on a GD Gulfstream while being fanned by Mario Batali!!!
Oh yeah, that's not what being a REAL chef is about.
C'mon, let's clean out a greasetrap. Let's work 6 consecutive 20 hour shifts with a 12 hour "light" day on Sunday......For 2 months straight(on a crap salary) Let's sweat completely through our clothes, leather belt and shoes included. Let's chafe our gnad's till they bleed!!!! And then rub some Fler de Sel on them.
That's a chef.



There's much more to come, but who do you hate the most?
Please share and please tell me why.
I'm thinking I'll elaborate on Batali next post........


P.S. Guy Fieri does not count as a chef.


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## Vertigo

knyfeknerd said:


> I'm not gonna lie, Kitchen Confidential is one of the best books ever written.


I stopped reading your post at this line, and refuse to keep reading until you fix it.


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## marc4pt0

I was going to say guy fiero, but you beat me with your very accurate disclaimer


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## knyfeknerd

Vertigo said:


> I stopped reading your post at this line, and refuse to keep reading until you fix it.



I'm going to lie through my teeth right now and say the "edit post" option has timed out already.......
......I'm eagerly awaiting your response though Vertigo. C'mon who's it gonna be???
Tyler Florence?
Bobby Flay?
Jamie Oliver?
I know how much you love Giada and want to have sloppy "amore" with her!!!


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## Lucretia

Can a home cook chime in? Mario has that ponytail, you'd think somebody would use it as a handle and pull his head out of his butt. "OOOoo! I'm Italian!" No, you're from Seattle. You're a mutt like many Americans. AND your marinara sauce in the jar at the grocery store really, really sucks.


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## DeepCSweede

Chris, 
I have to disagree with you because I think Bourdain realizes that he gave up on being a chef long ago and embraced being a writer/journalist/and just rambing ranter a long time ago. I had this discussion with someone the other day that said he sold out. He didn't sell out because I don't think he really promotes himself as a chef.

However, a lot of the "celebrity" chefs out there have sold out because they still call themselves such and make no effort to continue the craft. I think you hit it on the head with Fieri - total hack. My personal top on the list is Rocco Dispirito. 

I am not a pro just a humble homey so maybe I should keep my mouth shut. I have nothing but respect for ya'll though and if I wasn't a CPA I would be in the trenches with ya.


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## Vertigo

knyfeknerd said:


> I'm going to lie through my teeth right now and say the "edit post" option has timed out already.......
> ......I'm eagerly awaiting your response though Vertigo. C'mon who's it gonna be???
> Tyler Florence?
> Bobby Flay?
> Jamie Oliver?
> I know how much you love Giada and want to have sloppy "amore" with her!!!



Ha! How to decide?! I hate so many of them. Work starts at 4am tomorrow and is followed 11 hours later by a date with a judge, so I have some time to think about it. :jumping2:


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## Mike9

knyfeknerd said:


> C'mon, let's clean out a grease trap. Let's work 6 consecutive 20 hour shifts with a 12 hour "light" day on Sunday......For 2 months straight(on a crap salary) Let's sweat completely through our clothes, leather belt and shoes included. Let's chafe our gnad's till they bleed!!!! And then rub some Fler de Sel on them.



Precisely why I will NEVER, EVER, NEVER work in a commercial kitchen EVER, NEVER, EVER again.


OH yeah - watching Mario try to school Eric Ripert is a hoot -


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## knyfeknerd

Vertigo said:


> Ha! How to decide?! I hate so many of them. Work starts at 4am tomorrow and is followed 11 hours later by a date with a judge, so I have some time to think about it. :jumping2:


Damn, I hope the judge is hot and that she puts out!

Seriously though, I hope court doesn't suck. Best of luck to ya. I've been there before.


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## brainsausage

I've heard from a few different people who ate at Les Halle's during his tenure, and had less than kind things to say. He's a writer who fell into cooking, hacked his way along, and eventually got out. Maybe he's 'been in the trenches' but that doesn't make him any better than any other hack. Just watch him try and cook in any of the episodes of no reservations. He looks incredibly awkward.

I find his writing rather self serving and vitriolic personally. Entertaining occasionally, but rather repetitive(no offense Chris. Opinions are like- well, you know the rest...). He is a fun guy to watch on the tube though. And I bet he'd be great to go on a bender with. Well maybe a couple years ago, anyways. Too famous now...


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## brainsausage

Mike9 said:


> Precisely why I will NEVER, EVER, NEVER work in a commercial kitchen EVER, NEVER, EVER again.
> 
> 
> OH yeah - watching Mario try to school Eric Ripert is a hoot -



Never have, and hopefully never will. I'd rather make ten grand less a year doing something I enjoy, over being exploited till I burn out(says the guy with virtually no debt/bills...)


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## tkern

Now it comes to what do you mean "celebrity chef"? Keller, Ripert,Robuchon, even Fergus Henderson are celebrity chefs now. Wolfgang Puck, perhaps the first celebrity chef, made his bones for years in the kitchen. Fieri, Ray? yeah, F off. Some of these chefs busted their ass for years working 7 days/16hrs a week shift to make their food and restaurants perfect. Just because the media has taken an interest doesn't mean these people are any less of a cook and good for them for finally having to not be in the kitchen. I think its a myth that anyone with a family to support and an option to make life better, wouldn't take an opportunity to make life better and would foresake that to continue work those hours.


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## chinacats

I used to like watching Flay, but since I saw him putting Fage yogurt in everything that was too much. I'm sure some of you never cared for him anyway, but I did enjoy his rather simple southwest style cooking...once he became an Iron Chef it's all been downhill. BTW, I don't cook for a living, but have ultimate respect for those who do.
:2cents:


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## knyfeknerd

tkern, I'm asking at what point do you actually really give up cooking in a restaurant? 
No offense, but the day I see ANY of you guys in advertisement in Saveur or B.A. or Food & Wine in a private jet sipping on a mocktail in your MetroStylist designed wardrobe.....I'll hunt you down and smack you with a cast iron pan.
I've got a family to support and would love nothing more than to not work these hours..........
.......but how far would you sell out?


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## tkern

Hopefully, a chef passes his responsibility on to the best qualified person. i.e. Thomas Keller w/ Hollingsworth, Ziebold, etc.

What is selling out in the industry? Supporting a line of pans? (Puck) Supporting bullion cubes (Marco pierre white)? Supporting Mac knives (Keller)? Its not like people lives are on the line. 

If anyone bases their worth as a cook on what their heros do, its going to fail. Its like Led Zepplin in crysler commercials for musicians.


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## GlassEye

knyfeknerd said:


> tkern, I'm asking at what point do you actually really give up cooking in a restaurant?
> No offense, but the day I see ANY of you guys in advertisement in Saveur or B.A. or Food & Wine in a private jet sipping on a mocktail in your MetroStylist designed wardrobe.....I'll hunt you down and smack you with a cast iron pan.
> I've got a family to support and would love nothing more than to not work these hours..........
> .......but how far would you sell out?


I like to think I have integrity, and I truly respect integrity, but if offered a large enough check, you would probably have to hunt me down and smack me with a cast iron pan. The extra money and cast iron pan would be bit better than the current situation.


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## brainsausage

'Selling out' is a loaded term. Did Keller sell out when he wrote a book for at home cooks? Did Morimoto sell out when he agreed to do Iron Chef America?


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## slowtyper

A lot of overreaction in this thread IMO


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## brainsausage

Do we have to be chained to a stove for the rest of our lives 24/7, to maintain a sense of self worth? If someone offered me Flay type money, I'd take it and run. And make the most awesomest at home kitchen ever. And cook when I wanted to. Not because I had to due to monetary concerns. I LOVE FOOD. I typically love cooking. But I'm not a line junkie. I enjoy the creative aspect, learning new techniques, and developing my craft. Sweating over a hectic service just doesn't appeal to me anymore. Probably why I'm into charcuterie, and am moving more and more into an administrative/ prep what I want when I want/ conceptualize ideas role.


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## brainsausage

slowtyper said:


> A lot of overreaction in this thread IMO



To?


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## JohnnyChance

As someone who did their first local tv cooking spot today..I hope the celeb chef doesn't die out before I get paid, son!


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## Chuckles

> Do we have to be chained to a stove for the rest of our lives 24/7, to maintain a sense of self worth? If someone offered me Flay type money, I'd take it and run. And make the most awesomest at home kitchen ever. And cook when I wanted to. Not because I had to due to monetary concerns. I LOVE FOOD. I typically love cooking. But I'm not a line junkie. I enjoy the creative aspect, learning new techniques, and developing my craft. Sweating over a hectic service just doesn't appeal to me anymore. Probably why I'm into charcuterie, and am moving more and more into an administrative/ prep what I want when I want/ conceptualize ideas role.



+1

I now want my tombstone to read: "Killed with a black pan by a man named knyfeknerd" -- and the baby goes to college.


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## hambone.johnson

if anyone has actually READ any of bourdain's books he openly admids, as many have said; im not a chef, im a writer. cooking is something i have done to pay bills and ive treated it as such. he states that at a critical point in his career he could have done $$ or the craft and he chose $$ and blow/crank and spent the 80's bouncing around and amounting to nothing. in his new book, medium raw, he sais that he sits around and at one point all these high guys admit that at some point you just do it for the money, you do it so someone else can run your flagship restaurant so they can have enough noteriety to go open their own place. you stop doing it for you and you do it for the rest. there is also a part in No reservations las vegas when he talks about the vegs "per se" from T. keller and why he went vegas and Keller said similar things. at some point you either expand at promote the good people with in, or you loose them to their own restaurants and other people waving their dreams in front of them. The U.S. food scene is riddled with it. very few have any real integrity once they get the name and the stuff. so few commit to the craft any more. look at David Chang with 3+ places and food spots. the problem is we all work so hard at some point you just give in to the $ i think. 
i'd like to say that if i had my own little place and could pack the house at 95-120 a night and do my own food i would be satisfied and i wouldnt ever expand i would just be happy. but the older i get the more i comporomise. so i cant say either way.

personally. i think i lost faith when Thomas Keller went corporate. i mean Damn. he WAS the 1990's/2k. everyone wanted to be him. he redefined the American chef putting his craft on the line. doing one place. being fully booked. just cooking. just doing it. i mean the list of people who came out of the ORIGINAL french Laundry, guys who treated it like Garduate school and spent 2-4 years are amazing chefs, ive met a great many of them before the time of Bouchon and the publishing of the first french laundry book, then .. bouchon. ... then NYC. .. then ... then. ... then. .... so IDk . you gotta go to sleep at night. you gotta make it work. and its a hard industry. you gotta do your food and make your living and just be happy with that in the end i think. and also we can all cook, and still have lives! its pretty cool that right now you can ACUTALLY make a real good living and make a real GOOD paycheck as an executive chef if thats your end career path goal and you stick to it for a while and STILL have time off and family time. thats something that hasnt been available to past chef generations and i think we are dealing with the transition now.


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## Salty dog

I honestly would rather be just "comfortable" and call the shots. I would have an issue with exploitation.

I would prefer to be the Bernie Worrell of chef's than the Paul Mccartney.


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## ThEoRy

Pow!!

[video]http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/digital-shorts/video/update-guy-fieri/1261519/[/video]


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## Salty dog

Salty dog said:


> I honestly would rather be just "comfortable" and call the shots. I would have an issue with exploitation.
> 
> I would prefer to be the Bernie Worrell of chef's than the Paul Mccartney.



Oh, and own the real estate!


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## Chuckles

Right now I'd take a frying pan to the head for "comfortable and call the shots" without hesitation. 

Is Jon Besh a celebrity? He makes me uneasy when I see him on camera.


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## ecchef

You asked for it, so....... http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nat...usted-famous-chef-car-death-article-1.1251589


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## knyfeknerd

JohnnyChance said:


> As someone who did their first local tv cooking spot today..I hope the celeb chef doesn't die out before I get paid, son!


Link to this please! We would all like to critique your performance!

Oh and you other guys are funny.
Which pans are best for bashing people in the head? I think there was a thread about cast iron here somewhere:cookingegg::cookingegg::cookingegg::feedkids::feedkids::feedkids:


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## mr drinky

Death is a pretty harsh sentence -- except for Guy Fieri. As the stature of chefs has risen, the 'chef' term is more abused it seems. Frankly, I like how they added 'celebrity' to it as for me it means things like: 'not a real chef' or 'not a chef anymore'. I've also met my fair share of line cooks who don't give a crap about food, learning their trade, expanding their technique or familiarity with other flavors etc who love to call themselves a chef. They can piss me off too in the right situation. 

I mean, is Paul Bocuse a celebrity chef or even a chef any more? He no longer cooks at his restaurant. I love how he was asked one time: "Who cooks the food in your restaurant when you are gone?" His response was: "The same people who cook the food when I am there." If a chef has done their time and are good cooks, I have no problem with them cashing in.

Putting crap shows on TV is another thing, but that is why we have DVRs.

k.


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## shankster

"If a chef has done their time and are good cooks, I have no problem with them cashing in"
Agreed.

You can only bust your ass on the line for so long before you burn out completely,if someone drives up with a truck full of cash,you'd be crazy to say no.
What is the definition of "selling out" anyway? Becoming a executive/corporate chef who sits on his/her ass all day,never stepping on the line? Someone shilling pots and pans/knives/soup?
who cares.let them have their cake..


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## Lefty

Sorry, I didn't read through all if these posts. However, I get you. It's incredibly hypocritical of Anthony Bourdain to be on an absolute **** show like "The Taste". I'm a big fan of his, and I even tuned in, when I found out he was on it. He's the same old Tony, but man does that show suck... Anyways....

I do feel that I should stick up for the world of celebrity chefs, because they really are just taking a nice paycheck home to their families, and we'd all do the same. I'm a Tyler Florence fan (or I was when I watched Food Network). He, along with Anthony Sedlak (RIP), all of the guys on Iron Chef America in its early days helped keep me excited about cooking when I needed extra motivation or inspiration. When I was a kid, I watched Chef Pasquale (RIP), and "Wok with Yan" whenever I could. If I see these show on the air, I'll keep them on for a few minutes, get all melancholy and realize you can never go back to the green. It's just part of life. For me to say I hate celebrity chefs would be more hypocritical than anything Anthony Bourdain is currently subjecting himself and America to. These "chefs" made me love cooking, or at the very least, fanned the flames. As a matter of fact, since I became too good for these shows, my passion for food has waned. Maybe I need a heaping spoonful of trite celebrity chefdom to make me remember why I love to cook. I now cook at work (in a different setting than most of you here), and it feels damned good seeing a group of guys stuffing their faces with food I gave a **** about. When a new guy comes in and says, "I heard we eat well here, because of you", well that's pretty friggin' nice... Sadly, at home, until the past couple of months, my wife was not getting to eat the food I cooked with love, because after cookin at work, I didn't want to make anything complicated. She told me she missed seeing me in the kitchen, singing some stupid song, accidentally dropping a piece or five of food onto the floor for my dog to help clean up. I lost my passion for food, and it's now coming back...Thank God! Turns out I missed it too. 

I can't help but think that many chefs "in the trenches" hold some animosity towards celebrity chefs because they make huge coin, and don't have to pull 70 hour weeks. I've come to realize that many chefs also hold some hard feeling towards the "Martha Stewart crowd", and it turns out I was getting caught up in the same BS. At least this crowd, or some of them, love doing what they're doing in the kitchen; look around the next time you're at work and count the people in there who truly give a **** about their craft. Then count the number who are doing it purely to pay the bills. Is one more honorable than the other? Not to me. Honor is in doing what you can and what is necessary to put a roof over the head of your loved ones and to make sure they have food in their bellies. If you can be passionate about what you do to provide for your family, then congratulations - you are blessed. However, just being a home cook, or someone who looks up to celebrity chefs is not something to be ashamed about. Is there anything wrong with going to work, picking your kid up from school, hugging, and I mean actually meaning it when you hug, hugging your husband or wife and then putting together a meal that was put together with pride and excitement for your family to enjoy? If there is, then I want out. Somewhere along the lines we must have forgotten what matters.


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## DeepCSweede

My biggest issue now is that almost all the television shows out there are focused on reality television and not on the process and performance of cooking. The biggest culprit is the food network. Chopped, cupcake wars, restaurant impossible, and most importantly triple D could all be axed and I would not miss them for a day. Create channel on pbs is about the only shows on food that I will watch anymore. Bayless and Eric Ripert and Pepin is about all I have watched recently and now my digital cable goes out and I can't even watch those anymore.

As a homey cook, I really enjoy learning new techniques and processes that I did not previously know how to do. I grew up watching Yan and Justin Wilson and that really turned into a passion for food. That is where I enjoy watching Ripert, Bayless and Pepin. Selling out is such a fine line to getting paid for something you are passionate about. I don't care if those people sold out, ultimately the producers and the network execs end up ruining the shows for marketing and making a buck. If any of you really think Bourdain "Sold" out then read his rant about why No Reservations got axed. He refused to accept product placements for something that he didn't want to promote. If I could reduce my 70-80 hour weeks and get paid more to do it, I guess I probably would consider that too. 

From an executive perspective, I remember a quote that a very successful CEO told me once that has always stuck in my head. The key to a successful person isn't always being the best or the smartest, it is surrounding yourself with the best and smartest people and making sure that they know they are appreciated for what they do. That breeds loyalty. Some of these people realize this and set strict guidelines to their product but give latitude to their people to create and cultivate the product. That is why their restaurants still do well. Others will just be a flash in the pan and be gone. I guess that probably will be the true test if these individuals restaurants stand the test of time or if they go quickly along the wayside.


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## chinacats

I grew up watching another celebrity chef--Julia Child, still the original source of my interest in well prepared food. I do not watch tv so can't say how bad the current crop is, but it had been getting bad last I paid attention. I know I sound old just saying this, but times sure have changed.


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## Icontrol

ThEoRy said:


> Pow!!
> 
> [video]http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/digital-shorts/video/update-guy-fieri/1261519/[/video]




Very nice! Too funny!


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## Chifunda

Give me Jacques and "Two Fat Ladies" and I'm a happy guy. :bliss:


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## franzb69

wow somebody actually remembers the two fat ladies from bbc. 

=D

grew up watching them, jacques and julia child. and a side of "wonda powda!", cook with yan. lol.

made me wanna cook for a living.


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## Lefty

Me too! Then I found out I can sleep at work, drive a big red truck that is noisey as all hell, cut cars apart and cook for a living.


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## JohnnyChance

knyfeknerd said:


> Link to this please! We would all like to critique your performance!



http://www.ctnow.com/videogallery/7...s-Slow-Poached-Farm-Egg-For-Taste-Of-Hartford


I'm the one on the left in the purple.


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## knyfeknerd

JohnnyChance said:


> http://www.ctnow.com/videogallery/7...s-Slow-Poached-Farm-Egg-For-Taste-Of-Hartford
> 
> 
> I'm the one on the left in the purple.


You're way hotter than I remembered.


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## Lucretia

JohnnyChance said:


> http://www.ctnow.com/videogallery/7...s-Slow-Poached-Farm-Egg-For-Taste-Of-Hartford
> 
> 
> I'm the one on the left in the purple.



Hey! That's great! 

And you're cute as a bug's ear! I'd watch you over Ray Ray any day (and I don't mean the bobblehead in purple.)


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## jayhay

Here here, brother.

Throw some cornstarch on the chafed gnads/gooch. You'll feel like a million bucks 

Personally, I can't stand Bobby Flay. But Martin Yan is the man.

This is my 200th post. I'm glad I could use the word gooch in my 200th post.


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## knyfeknerd

*NEEEEEXXXTT UP!*
O Mario Batali, the entire population of Italy knows less than you do about any and all things Italian. Anything ever created in the history of the universe was first invented in Italy. And you love to proclaim this. You will speak on and on and on and on about it without pausing for a breath until you almost pass out from lack of oxygen. 
The pompous whimsy tone of your voice makes me want to gouge out my eardrums with bamboo skewers. 
I've got some of your cookbooks that I do like. I'm pretty sure you are a damn good cook too. But please shut up about Italy. 
Humpty Dumpty called and he wants his body back.
If I ever saw you on the street I would cut that disgusting bald-man comb-over pony tail thing off and shove it in your mouth so you wouldn't shout from the mountaintops about the glory of all things Italian.
I've got no problem with Italy, just your incessant unprovoked impromptu history lesson if I were to even mention anything food or non-food related. 
Do you own ANY clothes besides orange Crocs, cargo shorts and a fleece vest?
Yep, you're rich and I'm not. You'll laugh all the way to the bank or whatever it's called in Italian.
But I wish you would just go away for a looooooonnngggg time.


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## Lucretia

:rofl2:

He annoys the living daylights out of me.


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## chinacats

Lucretia said:


> :rofl2:
> 
> He annoys the living daylights out of me.



lus1: me too!


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## mr drinky

Hmmmm. Mario Batali has never been my favorite. I've never owned one of his books or watched any cooking shows of his other than the occasional Iron Chef. BUT when I went to Chicago a few years ago I tried to make a reservation at The Publican. They were closed for a charity event. So after some searching, I ended up buying tickets to the charity event and Mario was cooking with Paul Kahan. Before the dinner, Mario played guitar with a grammy-award-winning music ensemble. He sucked, but he played. 

Our freaked out American celebrity food scene makes it easy to caricature these types -- especially since Mario is fat and wears those awful clothes, hair, and crocs...but I cut him some slack because of this. A lot of them chefs -- just like Batali did that night -- use their image and stature for charity too. 

I just throw that out there. He helped raise thousands of dollars for music in the Chicago area. With all that is bad, also comes some good -- usually.

k.

Edit: Sorry for the downer, I know it is fun to rip on these guys, and I myself like to do it too. I just had to say this as I have some personal experience to the contrary.


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## franzb69

so long as he does good for people, then it ain't so bad. =D

i remember this article on Bon Jovi giving back.... he may be not a celebrity chef, but a celebrity nonetheless.

opening up a pay what you can place for the hungry.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/10/20/jon-bon-jovis-charity-res_n_1020628.html


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## Shala

I read all of it, so I feel sorry to shock.


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## eaglerock

What about Joe Bastianich ? :whistling:


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## Lefty

I agree with a lot of your Batali talk, but I still like the guy and would love to drink a Peroni or five with him on the patio. I bet he's hilarious! 

Confession time...we all have guilty pleasures, right?.. Well, with my funny schedule, I'm...ahem...forced into daytime tv, sometimes. And, well...I kinda like "The Chew". There, I said it!


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## franzb69

i hate me bastianich. he can have his restaurants and shove it. =D


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## eaglerock

his mom is ok but he is .....


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## franzb69

agreed. =D


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## Duckfat

JohnnyChance said:


> http://www.ctnow.com/videogallery/7...s-Slow-Poached-Farm-Egg-For-Taste-Of-Hartford
> 
> 
> I'm the one on the left in the purple.





Didn't I see you on "Duck Dynasty?


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## Jmadams13

Lefty said:


> I agree with a lot of your Batali talk, but I still like the guy and would love to drink a Peroni or five with him on the patio. I bet he's hilarious!
> 
> Confession time...we all have guilty pleasures, right?.. Well, with my funny schedule, I'm...ahem...forced into daytime tv, sometimes. And, well...I kinda like "The Chew". There, I said it!



Oh Tom..... I guess we can forgive you for that, maybe, lol


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## tkern

JohnnyChance said:


> http://www.ctnow.com/videogallery/7...s-Slow-Poached-Farm-Egg-For-Taste-Of-Hartford
> 
> 
> I'm the one on the left in the purple.



You're a bit more ursine than what I remember. Getting colder up there?


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## ThEoRy

"You'll go Lansberry... for this cranberry.... cause it's dinner she wrote."


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## DeepCSweede

tkern said:


> You're a bit more ursine than what I remember. Getting colder up there?



He is just trying to emulate the avatars of Son and Pierre - be gentle he IS a celebrity now.


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## JohnnyChance

tkern said:


> You're a bit more ursine than what I remember. Getting colder up there?



Between the holidays and now restaurant week(s), just haven't had time to shave...or get a hair cut. 

Honestly, I don't know. Just the way it is right now.


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## knyfeknerd

*The Deen Family*
I know I'm not the only/first person to express my hatred for Paula, but I must add that her sons are absolute turdburglars as well.
#1 -Your food sucks. Your restaurant that made you "famous" is a disgusting southern heart-attack buffet. The food there is tourist-trap garbage. I'd rather munch on a warm nugget out of my cat's litter box than eat at your establishment.
#2 Hey Yeauwwww!!!! That voice! It's like nails on a chalk board. Hay Ya'll. Errgghhhh
#3 Over Exposure-I can't turn on the TV without your face or one of your son's dumb-asses doing a cooking spot or making a cameo appearance on something. I even saw 2 different Paula Deen knife block sets at Wal-Mart last week. I'll bet Chef Giovanni would like these.
#4 Not just you but your whole family has cashed in on the healthy eating kick. You are pimping any and every product -healthy or not now that you have (in Wilford Brimley voice) Diabetes. I don't only have to suffer through your crap, but now your idiot son has "reworked" all your "classic southern" recipes to be healthy. As if it wasn't bad enough the first time!!!!
#5 You give the south a bad name (sure sing it to the tune of the Bon Jovi song why don'tcha). You and your clan DO NOT represent the Southeastern U.S. You are giving us a bad rep and I insist that you cease and desist! 

I could go on, but you get the point.


----------



## Zwiefel

Def no fan of Deen. I got a free meal at her joint in a casino a fee years ago. Awful....with the exception of the greens, which were delightful. The okra may have been a felony though.


----------



## Lucretia

knyfeknerd said:


> I'd rather munch on a warm nugget out of my cat's litter box than eat at your establishment.



Got a recipe for you here.


----------



## Salty dog

I stole Paula's grilled oysters. They have done me well. Probably the only episode I ever watched.

Below: With my best friend and former lover and my buddy Jacques. 

That was 55 lbs. ago.


----------



## knyfeknerd

Dang Salty, I had no idea you used to be so large. Congrats on looking and feeling better.
Love me some Jacques.


----------



## mr drinky

Paula Deen definitely sucks in my book, and to boot she sounds like my ex-wife's family. Never a good thing. 

I've seen her a couple of times at the Chicago Housewares show, and she is just as annoying in person, and the crowd watching her...well let's just say that it's a different type of food crowd and they use up lots of cream of mushroom soup. 

k.


----------



## Chuckles

I remember her on NPR. When asked if she could bread a couch. Sure, she said. It's easy, just dip it in egg first.

I think this sums it up.


----------



## knyfeknerd

*Michael Freakin' Symon!!!!*
I'm not going to go on at length.............
......but I just saw Another Lay's potato chip commercial featuring Eva Longoria and Chef Michael Symon.
This one is pimping:
*Chicken and Waffle
Sriracha
Cheesy Garlic Bread*
Flavored potato chips
Disgusting-The Chips
Sell Out-Michael Symon
Hottie-Eva Longoria

LAME


----------



## franzb69

there's a fad going around in my country with local celebrities taking up culinary courses and then making restaurants suddenly calling themselves chefs. not only that! they get their own cooking shows and judging cooking competitions on TV. it's just retarded! so they're techinically "celeberity chefs" in their own minds. W.T.F. seriously, most annoying thing ever.

it's great that they're innovating and rebranding themselves to make more money but banking their celebrity to call themselves celebrity chefs just coz they went through culinary school already makes them chefs? i mean i finished culinary school myself but i couldn't even dare call myself a chef. i'm a cook, always have been and will always be. but what they're doing is just BLAHHHHHHHH.

it's admirable that these celebrities actually value further education (even if half of them never bothered finishing highschool, much less college and know nothing about having a real job).... but jeez....


----------



## tkern

mr drinky said:


> Paula Deen definitely sucks in my book, and to boot she sounds like my ex-wife's family. Never a good thing.
> 
> I've seen her a couple of times at the Chicago Housewares show, and she is just as annoying in person, and the crowd watching her...well let's just say that it's a different type of food crowd and they use up lots of cream of mushroom soup.
> 
> k.



I'll be cooking at Deen's bbq thing at the food and wine fest in Miami next weekend. I'll let y'all know how it goes.


----------



## Zwiefel

tkern said:


> I'll be cooking at Deen's bbq thing at the food and wine fest in Miami next weekend. I'll let y'all know how it goes.



Please do...be interested to see how that plays out.


----------



## brainsausage

tkern said:


> I'll be cooking at Deen's bbq thing at the food and wine fest in Miami next weekend. I'll let y'all know how it goes.



I bet there's a butter shortage.


----------



## brainsausage

JohnnyChance said:


> Between the holidays and now restaurant week(s), just haven't had time to shave...or get a hair cut.
> 
> Honestly, I don't know. Just the way it is right now.



I'd like five minutes in a room alone with the bastard who implemented restaurant week...

Be good practice for that ancient Beatty I picked up...


----------



## mr drinky

brainsausage said:


> I'd like five minutes in a room alone with the bastard who implemented restaurant week...
> 
> Be good practice for that ancient Beatty I picked up...



+1, I absolutely hate restaurant weeks. I'm a consumer, and I think they suck and are a horrible idea.

k.


----------



## mano

We have RW here in Philly and my grown kids were excited to go with their friends. I was the buzz-kill but at least now they know.


----------



## knyfeknerd

Restaurant Week=Rookie Week
It's a lot like New Years. All the people that never go out to eat..........
..........Dummied-down menus. All the great tippers come out too.:hungry::cheffry::knifed::thebbq::cook::bbq::bbqsmoker::cookingegg::cooking::cookingdinner::theline::shots::feedkids:


----------



## boomchakabowwow

you guys are crazy!! celebrity cooks and all the insane stuff on TV has changed the game. the odd fellow that thought a can of chef boy R dee was a good substitute for a pasta dinner now is slowly trickling into becoming a foodie. 

people are cooking, buying better ingredients, better TOOLS (like your knives), and exploring different foods.

i have a friend that would only eat rice and soy sauce in a chinese restaurant. he is is now a decent cook because of (egads!) Giada. call me crazy, i think this is a good thing. i grew up in a foodie family. i had a hand in the game at an early age.


----------



## slowtyper

knyfeknerd said:


> *Michael Freakin' Symon!!!!*
> I'm not going to go on at length.............
> ......but I just saw Another Lay's potato chip commercial featuring Eva Longoria and Chef Michael Symon.
> This one is pimping:
> *Chicken and Waffle
> Sriracha
> Cheesy Garlic Bread*
> Flavored potato chips
> Disgusting-The Chips
> Sell Out-Michael Symon
> Hottie-Eva Longoria
> 
> LAME


I scanned your list and thought "hotie-eva longoria" was a chip flavour!


----------



## Chef Doom

Keep in mind that I only read the first page of this thread at the time of this posting.

Say what you will about Rachael Ray, and I'm pretty sure that I can cook much better than she can, but if she ever, and I do mean EVER, wants to give me a private cooking lesson at my place, or better yet her place, I can guarantee you that I will clear out my schedule for that day without fail. And I would brag about the aftermath to every cooking and tabloid magazine that is willing to believe my story. Of coarse, the only reason I watch her show is to catch moments when she closes a refrigerator door with her hips. I mostly watch it on mute.


----------



## The hekler

Chef Doom said:


> Keep in mind that I only read the first page of this thread at the time of this posting.
> 
> Say what you will about Rachael Ray, and I'm pretty sure that I can cook much better than she can, but if she ever, and I do mean EVER, wants to give me a private cooking lesson at my place, or better yet her place, I can guarantee you that I will clear out my schedule for that day without fail. And I would brag about the aftermath to every cooking and tabloid magazine that is willing to believe my story. Of coarse, the only reason I watch her show is to catch moments when she closes a refrigerator door with her hips. I mostly watch it on mute.



Rachel Ray doesn't hold a candle to Giada DeLuarentis either at cooking or in the looks department.


----------



## franzb69

yep. +1 for giada =D


----------



## ThEoRy

Chef Doom said:


> Keep in mind that I only read the first page of this thread at the time of this posting.
> 
> Say what you will about Rachael Ray, and I'm pretty sure that I can cook much better than she can, but if she ever, and I do mean EVER, wants to give me a private cooking lesson at my place, or better yet her place, I can guarantee you that I will clear out my schedule for that day without fail. And I would brag about the aftermath to every cooking and tabloid magazine that is willing to believe my story. Of coarse, the only reason I watch her show is to catch moments when she closes a refrigerator door with her hips. I mostly watch it on mute.



I just threw up in my mouth. She's gross and besides she likes guys about 50 years older than you.


----------



## Zwiefel

ThEoRy said:


> I just threw up in my mouth. She's gross and besides she likes guys about 50 years older than you.



Gotta go with Rick on this one.


----------



## Jmadams13

#3 on the puke in mouth. Ray is gross, every time I hear her laugh, I wanna punch myself in the beans. It would probably be less painful


----------



## tkern

View attachment 13423


----------



## Chef Doom

The hekler said:


> Rachel Ray doesn't hold a candle to Giada DeLuarentis either at cooking or in the looks department.



Until Giada has her own spread *cough* in an FHM or similar magazine, I will have to disagree with you. Except for when Rachael goes through her fat stages. Even though those FHM pics were photoshoped, they are not too far off from the truth.



ThEoRy said:


> I just threw up in my mouth. She's gross and besides she likes guys about 50 years older than you.



That is simply a reflection on your detest for her cooking skills. They are blinding you to the physical truth. SET YOUR EYES FREE FROM THE DARKNESS MY LOST LAMB!!!



Jmadams13 said:


> #3 on the puke in mouth. Ray is gross, every time I hear her laugh, I wanna punch myself in the beans. It would probably be less painful



There are plenty of ways to take care of the talking.


----------



## ThEoRy

That was like 15 years ago man.







uke: Not sexy.


----------



## Jmadams13

Again, Rick has is right.


----------



## daveb

CD - Not with yours.


----------



## tkern

ThEoRy said:


> That was like 15 years ago man.
> View attachment 13424
> 
> View attachment 13425
> 
> View attachment 13426
> 
> 
> uke: Not sexy.



kinda turned on


----------



## kalaeb

Ehh, we can think about Steely's historical hotties, why not Ray Ray in her prime. 

Kate Moss is still 21 in my eyes.


----------



## mr drinky

FWIW, I think that Georgia Pellegrini is hot -- and she totes a weapon once in a while. 

k.


----------



## SameGuy

Even if Nigella isn't an actual trained chef, I'd have let her school me 15 or so years ago. RrrroooWWWRRR!


----------



## boomchakabowwow

i think Laura Calder is smoking hot. she has a soft gentle voice and her moves..eesh!


----------



## brainsausage

I love the turn this thread has taken- it was headed down and now it's definitely turning up:groucho:


----------



## DeepCSweede

kalaeb said:


> Ehh, we can think about Steely's historical hotties, why not Ray Ray in her prime.
> 
> Kate Moss is still 21 in my eyes.



Yeah but Kate Upton won't be 21 until June.


----------



## Jmadams13

^yup to Laura Calder


----------



## knyfeknerd

You guys are going WAAAAAAAYYYYYYY OT on me!!!!!!
This is about Chodey Chefs, not hotties!
Wait, how did disgusting pics of RayRae get in here too!!!!!??????????
Let's get back ON TOPIC !!!
*Rocco DiSpirito*
I honestly think he couldn't even manage to toast a Pop-Tart.
This guy was the original sellout. The reality show "The Restaurant" was such a giant steaming pile of crap. At first before it came on I was excited, hoping this would portray the reality of a restaurant. 
Ummmmmm......
Not so much. Superstar Rocco being followed around by a camera crew in a freakin' helicopter. Driving a strategically placed Mitsubishi. Drinking nothing but strategically placed Coors Light. All crap product placement, followed by a team meeting of Koom-bye-yah-my Rocco.
I don't think he could even figure out the stove in a restaurant!


----------



## Jmadams13

What about Rocco's dinner party show. Watched it once, hated him ever sense


----------



## DeepCSweede

Sorry Chris
Yeah - That show really proved Rocco knows nothing about running a restaurant and in addition, he was spreading himself so thin being a "SUPERSTAR" that the restaurant was bound to fail.

Okay I am throwing one out to add to Rocco. Geoffery Zakarian - The guy may be ubertalented but he just reeks of high fallutin' d-baggery. I think I would have a tough time being in the same room with him because he would suck all of the air out of it with his massive ego. Prove me wrong please.


----------



## shankster

i think Laura Calder is smoking hot"

Agreed! Something about her is so very sexxxy.She's a bit goofy in a hot, smokin' kinda way...


----------



## mpukas

knyfeknerd said:


> *Michael Freakin' Symon!!!!*
> I'm not going to go on at length.............
> ......but I just saw Another Lay's potato chip commercial featuring Eva Longoria and Chef Michael Symon.
> This one is pimping:
> *Chicken and Waffle
> Sriracha
> Cheesy Garlic Bread*
> Flavored potato chips
> Disgusting-The Chips
> Sell Out-Michael Symon
> Hottie-Eva Longoria
> 
> LAME



How is it Micheal Symon is a sell-out for doing a chip commercial but Eva Longoria is not? Is it becasue she can't cook and he can?


----------



## mpukas

Mo Rocca - completely, utterly useless. 

Love Laura Calder.


----------



## knyfeknerd

mpukas said:


> How is it Micheal Symon is a sell-out for doing a chip commercial but Eva Longoria is not? Is it becasue she can't cook and he can?


Eva Longoria is an actress NOT a chef.
Thus the title of the thread.


----------



## mr drinky

knyfeknerd said:


> You guys are going WAAAAAAAYYYYYYY OT on me!!!!!!
> This is about Chodey Chefs, not hotties!



It might be a little off topic, but your topic is about death to celebrity chefs. Shouldn't we save the prettiest ones and let them live?  

Btw, what do people think about Emeril? He's always been a bit of an enigma to me. He doesn't shove things in your face to hate (usually). 

k.


----------



## DeepCSweede

I ate at a couple of Emeril's restaurants back in the day before I had any clue who he was. He was already on the food network at the time but I had never seen the show. He came out to greet tables during service and I thought he was extremely gracious. I ended up picking up one of his books a year or so later and that said he had a tv show on the food network. 
On top chef, both he and Wolfgang Puck appear very humble at the opportunities that they have been given. That is the same attitude he portrayed in the restaurant before he became popular.


----------



## brainsausage

For some reason I don't hate Emiril. He's kitchsy, and overexposed, but always comes across as a nice guy in his guest appearances. I can't recall the names of his shows, but I always thought the one that didn't involve the band/studio audience was great for home cooks. He gave good pro tips, was straight forward and didnt waste your time with goofy stories or dumb down the recipes. I've also never heard any gossip regarding him being a prick to work for, or a crappy chef etc. Not that I'm constantly looking for that kind of gossip, but y'know...


----------



## knyfeknerd

mr drinky said:


> It might be a little off topic, but your topic is about death to celebrity chefs. Shouldn't we save the prettiest ones and let them live?
> 
> Btw, what do people think about Emeril? He's always been a bit of an enigma to me. He doesn't shove things in your face to hate (usually).
> 
> k.


I hope all you guys know that I am not at all serious in any of my posts. -just a semi-disclaimer.

OK Karring, mano started a rebuttal thread to this one entitled "Long live celebrity chefs" http://www.kitchenknifeforums.com/showthread.php/10485-Long-Live-Celebrity-Chefs!
Any hotties or reasons on "why Tyler Florence is more important than Escoffier" should be included in mano's thread.
We here, Us here (this thread) are all about being jaded, grumpy and cynical as to pretty much any and all celebrity chefs!

To address Emeril....no harm, no foul. The guy's been around forever. Supposedly got kicked out of Johnston & Wales for doing blow back-in-the-day, has paid his dues and made an empire from scratch.......
.......I can't stand to watch him cook on TV, but I'm a bad audience. He keeps a lot of us chefs employed and interested to learn more about food. Nothing wrong with that.

Again, I hope you guys hardly ever take me seriously-you shouldn't.


----------



## brainsausage

Don't worry Chris- we never take you seriously:groucho:


----------



## jayhay

Ya'll gonna like this. 

http://guysamericankitchenandbar.com/

I guess Guy's team didn't register the web domain for the full reso name. So someone put this up for him. Good shite.


----------



## chinacats

Awesome Jayhay, could be confused for the real thing!


----------



## knyfeknerd

Schweeeettttt!
Great stuff jay! Lol


----------



## jayhay

One more for all the industry ppl. A lil off topic, but some great light reading. Basically it's hatin' on all the fake ass chefs out there. 

https://twitter.com/SryThomasKeller

Kinda deserves its own thread it's so good, imho. That's all I got for now


----------



## brainsausage

jayhay said:


> Ya'll gonna like this.
> 
> http://guysamericankitchenandbar.com/
> 
> I guess Guy's team didn't register the web domain for the full reso name. So someone put this up for him. Good shite.



This is tricking amazing! Thank you Jay, thank you so damn much...


----------



## mkmk

I was just about to post that fantastic page -- brilliant. Here's the front page:


----------



## mr drinky

That menu is awesome. I don't know what part made me laugh more. Thanks for the link.

k.


----------



## Zwiefel

chinacats said:


> Awesome Jayhay, could be confused for the real thing!



Perhaps you meant, "preferred to the real thing?" :rofl2:


----------



## Chef Doom

mr drinky said:


> It might be a little off topic, but your topic is about death to celebrity chefs. Shouldn't we save the prettiest ones and let them live?



+1


----------



## mr drinky

jayhay said:


> One more for all the industry ppl. A lil off topic, but some great light reading. Basically it's hatin' on all the fake ass chefs out there.
> 
> https://twitter.com/SryThomasKeller
> 
> Kinda deserves its own thread it's so good, imho. That's all I got for now



Oh man, my eyes were watering after reading this for 15 minutes. Thanks for that. This is the one that pushed me over the edge.

"Whenever I know chef is about to use the plastic wrap I run my knife over the center of the roll & unroll half of it like 15 times"

k.

Edit: Must get back on topic. Sorry Knyfe.


----------



## ecchef

brainsausage said:


> This is tricking amazing! Thank you Jay, thank you so damn much...



I almost choked to death reading this I was laughing so hard! This is easily in my top ten list of 'Things to make you pee in your pants'. Hilarious.


----------



## brainsausage

mr drinky said:


> Oh man, my eyes were watering after reading this for 15 minutes. Thanks for that. This is the one that pushed me over the edge.
> 
> "Whenever I know chef is about to use the plastic wrap I run my knife over the center of the roll & unroll half of it like 15 times"
> 
> k.
> 
> Edit: Must get back on topic. Sorry Knyfe.



I found that one particularly amusing as well...


----------



## Duckfat

mr drinky said:


> It might be a little off topic, but your topic is about death to celebrity chefs. Shouldn't we save the prettiest ones and let them live?
> 
> Btw, what do people think about Emeril?




If we let the pretty ones live they will continue to pollute the gene pool. 
I've been to a few of Emeril's restaurants and aside from Vegas I've never been disappointed but then I just find Vegas passe.
More than a few Celebrity Chef's are far more "celebrity" than Chef. Emeril doesn't really fall in that category IMO.


----------



## tkern

Just finished Food & Wine bbq hosted by paula deen. Perhaps one of the most souless people that I've ever heard speak. Its terrifying.


----------



## WildBoar

Emeril motivated me to start playing in the kitchen again back in the late-90s. Had a great meal in his LV resturant back then (don't remember if it was in Bellagio or Venetian). I think there were a lot less celeb chef restautrants in Vegas back then.

Was in NO in 2002, and ate at two of his resturants; both were great meals and the service was top notch. I think he set some pretty good standards, and his teams were great at executing. Don't know if the restuarants are still the same now though, as it's 11 years later.

Can't wait to hear some of Travis's F&W stories!


----------



## tkern

Taking a breather for a minute before the chef after party kick off thing happens... at my hotel.. in front of my room.... until 2am


----------



## brainsausage

tkern said:


> Taking a breather for a minute before the chef after party kick off thing happens... at my hotel.. in front of my room.... until 2am



Make us proud Travis- no quarter asked, no quarter given!


----------



## tkern

Had a few cocktails then meandered off to a dive bar. It was interesting seeing Emeril, todd english, tyler florence, jamie oliver, and a few others all hanging out together. Emeril was like a scorsese don.


----------



## Beohbe

Not really a celeb chef, but every time that Taco Bell commercial with Lorena Garcia comes on I have to restrain myself from throwing my tv out the front window... I don't know why. I just do.
The fact that even Taco Bell has jumped on the celeb chef bandwagon is evidence that some of these hacks just need to die.


----------



## Beohbe

Sorry to double post, but I just found a picture that irked the hell out of me. I've been contemplating having a leather knife roll made for me, and I found someone that makes some stunning ones, but g'damn Guy Fieri for ruining it for me:







Nice knives, Guy.
Oh, and the maker has like 3 other pictures up with his rolls filled with Shuns. Son, I am disappoint.


----------



## WildBoar

^^yeah, Guy has one of Steve Goodson's rolls. But do not let that deter you -- Steve's rolls are fantastic! Plus Steve is a super nice guy, and he visits here every now and then. Give him a call if you want to discuss having a knife roll made. Like the other vendors/ craftsmen on this forum, he is passionate about what he does, he puts his heart into his work, and he charges less then then the rolls are worth. If you see one of his rolls in person I think you will appreciate it.


----------



## Beohbe

WildBoar said:


> ^^yeah, Guy has one of Steve Goodson's rolls. But do not let that deter you -- Steve's rolls are fantastic! Plus Steve is a super nice guy, and he visits here every now and then. Give him a call if you want to discuss having a knife roll made. Like the other vendors/ craftsmen on this forum, he is passionate about what he does, he puts his heart into his work, and he charges less then then the rolls are worth. If you see one of his rolls in person I think you will appreciate it.



No worries, I wouldn't actually let something like that deter me. Stunning is stunning, and his work is definitely that. I was more on the fence about contacting him or Jonathan Wilson, to be honest. Definitely leaning more towards Steve, though. Butcher & Baker makes some nice ones, too, but something about Steve's rolls just make me drool. So damn rustic looking. Must. Have. :thumbsup:

It's just a shame that the picture Guy sent back to him is more Fieri than it is Goodson. Look at the counter behind him. Is he pointing at the knife roll or the ****** knives with his name on em? Hard to tell.


----------



## azchef

This also made me tear up as I was laughing so hard


mr drinky said:


> Oh man, my eyes were watering after reading this for 15 minutes. Thanks for that. This is the one that pushed me over the edge.
> 
> "Whenever I know chef is about to use the plastic wrap I run my knife over the center of the roll & unroll half of it like 15 times"
> 
> k.
> 
> Edit: Must get back on topic. Sorry Knyfe.


----------



## cnochef

WildBoar said:


> Emeril motivated me to start playing in the kitchen again back in the late-90s. Had a great meal in his LV resturant back then (don't remember if it was in Bellagio or Venetian). I think there were a lot less celeb chef restautrants in Vegas back then.



That was probably Emeril's Fish House in the MGM Grand. I had the intention of eating there but ended up at Mark Miller's Coyote Cafe instead and it was excellent.


----------

